Must-Have List

Must-haves for your Family and your Home

Tag: safety & hygiene

Bed Sharing (Co – Sleeping) Options

Cozy Cocoon® Ballerina Baby Cocoon & Hat Set

There is a lot of opinions about the pros and cons of bed sharing. One cannot be completely for bed sharing without acknowledging the risks just as those completely against it ignore the benefits of such arrangement. Leading pediatricians often have differing views on the subject and government agencies  seem to change their mind every five minutes (without conclusive scientific evidence to back them up). Ultimately it is, as it should be, a personal choice for the parents to make. Anyone who think parents are careless or un-thoughtful because they simply don’t follow the “flavor of the day” recommendation from a government official with some political agenda needs a lesson in humility (and usually a lesson in science as well).

Personally i fall on the side of favoring bed sharing WHEN BASIC SAFTEY RULES ARE FOLLOWED. Parents have been sleeping with their babies since time immemorial and most still do both in this and other countries at least occasionally. There is ample direct and anecdotal evidence for the benefits of bed sharing (see links below) including ease of breastfeeding, regulating the breathing of the baby, and improving physical and emotional development as well as the quality of bonding between baby and parents. If you are on the “British boarding school” side of the bonding debate – that is fine. Being somewhere in the middle is also fine. I chose to believe that love, positive reinforcement, and physical contact with your baby are never corrupting – no matter the dosage.  I find that this way of raising children does not produce any more selfish or self-centered children than alternative rearing methods and at the minimum is easier on the child.

If bed sharing is not for you, there is of course the option of room sharing.  This option has many of the benefits of bed sharing without the risks often quoted against bed sharing. Some cribs are especially designed to be attached to the bed so that the mother can easily reach the baby for feedings. See for example our post about  Arm’s Reach Mini Co-Sleeper Bassinet but there are of course many other similar cribs around.

If you are considering bed sharing understand the risks and make sure you follow common sense rules. You can find more professional advice in the links below but here is my 2 cent short list:

  • Bed sharing accidents are usually associated with very young babies (especially younger than 4 months old). Use more caution and strict safety measures with younger babies.
  • Have a co-sleeper or regular crib in the room as an option even if you are not regularly using it. Sometimes it is just good to get a break and be able to stretch a bit in bed.
  • If you are very tired, took sleeping pills, cold medicine, alcohol or any drugs that would make you sleep too deep - let the baby sleep in the crib.
  • When the baby is sleeping with you in bed have nothing on the mattress except a tight fitting bed sheet – not a blanket or a pillow. The room should not be too cold and you can wear heavier pajamas if you need to. As the baby gets a bit older (and can consciously push and move things to become more comfortable) you will sense when it is safe to add pillows and blankets.
  •  Consider using a “sleeper” which is a baby mattress with a soft small raised “border” around it. We used it in the first weeks after she was born and it works as an extra protection and to keep her from rolling around. You can find them on amazon (for example, the Close and Secure Baby Sleeper. I could not find the one we actually used – but just be sure it is long enough for your baby. Ones that can elevate the head are also useful if your baby has reflux).
  • Last, you can start with a co-sleeper or a regular crib in the room and let your baby spend more time in your bed as they get a bit bigger (a few months old).

Some good reads:

askdrsears.com
kidshealth.org
parenting.com
cosleeping.org
guideline.gov

Category: Baby Must-Haves, Toddler Must Have
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Flying Babies (Litterally)


I find it curious that the pilot and the flight attendants on my flight strap on a 4 point safety belt while it is presumably safe enough for me to strap in with a single belt. But when it comes to the “baby in arms” policy, I must say that my absolute trust in the FAA is somewhat shaken. Now, this post is not meant to criticize the FAA which is just amazing in my opinion – this post is just to suggest to other parents that holding your baby in your arms while flying may not be the safest way.

I think that the risk of a baby flying out of your hands during turbulence is probably low  (I certainly never heard of it happen but does that mean it does not happen?)  and most practical solutions do require buying an extra seat – so holding the baby may be your only choice. But if you can afford it I think you should consider buying an extra seat and bringing your FAA approved car seat.

The benefits: Your baby is safe and comfortable and will likely sleep better.  Your toddler is sitting in a reclined car seat which she is familiar with. Our toddler sleeps very comfortably for hours in the seat – something she would not do in our arms or sitting in the plane seat itself.

The challenge: you will need to use an FAA approved car seat and figure out how to secure it to the plane seat. The flight attendants may not be supportive of your efforts and i found that some were downright nasty. New car seats are fairly large so it is a good idea to place the car seat on the window chair on a side row or the middle seat in the middle row. Otherwise, you may have a hard time passing by. Some car seats like the Britax Advocate Car Seat displayed above (which i strongly recommend) have side impact cushions which can be removed – otherwise the car seat may encroach on the space of the seat beside it.


 There are other alternatives out there like the
Baby B’Air Flight Vest seen in this picture which i personally do not recommend. While i think that the vest will keep the baby tethered to you in the case of rough air, i am not sure that the baby is safe or that she is comfortable. I cannot see her sleeping for a long time in this position. I am also not sure it is approved by the FAA despite the mention of “FAA tested” and “FAA approved testing lab” in their amazon description.


Another option is the CARES Child Aviation Restraint System which we have tried and works reasonably well. This system is appropriate for older kids (weighing 22-44 pounds) and I would only recommend it for short flights for toddlers who will find it hard to sit on a standard plane seat for an extended amount of time. It is approved by the FAA.


The benefit of the restraint system is that it does not require bringing the heavy car seat with you on the plane. If you are planning to rent a car at the destination, then you will likely need the bring the car seat with you anyway. I do recommend trying out the Traveling Toddler Car Seat Travel Accessory which allows you to attach your car seat to your rolling suitcase (although i do not recommend having your kid strapped in while rolling the suit case as the photo suggests).

At any rate, i wish a safe flight with online departure!

Category: Baby Must-Haves, Toddler Must Have
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Recommended: California Baby hair products


I have no problem recommending California Baby Products as we have used many of them for years and they are simply great. I must admit that i often steal some of her California Baby shampoo with Tea Treewhich seems to help me with dandruff without being making my hair really dry. They are on the pricy side but if you, like us, spend millions of dollars on baby products you will probably find it worth while.

One product which we found a better alternative is the Johnson’s No More Tears No More Tangles Detangling Spray which does not dry her curly hair as much as the California Baby Botanical Hair De-Tangler

Category: Baby Must-Haves, Toddler Must Have
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Safety 1st Prograde Flat Screen TV Lock

Safety 1st Prograde Flat Screen TV LockWhile mounting the flat screen TV on the wall is probably a good idea, it may not be an option for you. In our case, it was impractical and expensive to mount so this TV lock was an excellent alternative.

First, a word about safety: with a toddler in the house you should secure every piece of furniture to the wall. The fact that kids cannot reach the top of the table makes them more likely to try to climb on it – not less. Even furniture that seems too heavy to tip over can in fact end up falling on your child.  Take for example a heavy dresser. Normally it is a pretty stable piece but if you open all the drawers at once (something that your kid may do as part of play or in attempt to climb on them) you may find that the dresser becomes very unstable and may even tip over by itself (please use caution while testing out my claim).  Flat screen TV sets are especially dangerous as they are very attractive to toddlers and can easily tip over.

Heavy furniture can be secured to the wall using a heavy duty Nylon Cable Tie (use the thickest you find) with 2 heavy duty D Ring Picture Hangers. Usually 2 sets on the top back of the furniture should be enough but use your own judgement there. Alternatively you can use furniture to wall straps such as the ones sold by Quakehold! or Saftey First. Please follow their instructions carefully. Either way, the critical part is that these ties or straps are actually securely attached to the furniture and the wall. Driving a regular screw into the drywall WILL NOT work and in fact may provide a false sense of safety. You must attach to the stud or use a special drywall screws such as the ones provided with the TV lock (these are screws with bolts with wings).This may require drilling and if this is not your area of expertise calling a professional is not a bad idea. 

The TV lock comes with an adjustable locking bar with 3 different lengths. Each length can be further adjusted (will make sense when you see it) to give you overall distance of 6 to 20 inches from the wall. The locking bar attaches to the back of the TV using VESA mount holes which every new flat screen TV should have (it is the same mount  holes normally used to mount the TV to the wall). This of course will not work with regular TVs (that is – not flat screen).  The lock is intended for TVs from 32 to 60 inch screens. The bar is secured to the wall using included screws with bolts with wings that I mentioned before. This does require drilling to prepare the holes (the screws actually require you to avoid hitting the stud) and this step can be a bit tricky so again – you may want to find someone with experience if you are not comfortable with power tools.

When the TV is secured to the wall it can still be turned sideways (pivot left/right) to adjust viewing direction. The lock prevents the TV from falling backwards or forwards – but allows you to move it sideways. There is a spring built-in the lock so it can be push back and forth just slightly. Since the TV is likely sitting on a piece of furniture you will need this flexibility. Also, you can easily detach the bar from the TV or the wall (without the need to take screws out) if you need to move the TV or clean under it.

All in all a perfect little invention which works great for us. Since our daughter feels the need to test our will at least once a day (she sneaks to the TV, looks at us, says “no no no” and then touches the TV…) this gadget is well appreciated in our home.

Category: Toddler Must Have
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